One thing I really struggled with while I was in Chile was the push and pull between wanting to run something and "the feeling". The feeling you get when you know you can nail a line, when you are ready to stomp it, when all the butterflies are flying in formation. It felt like some many times I would get to a rapid or a drop I had seen a million times in a video, read about for a year, or dreamt about styling and I would be confused. Did I have the feeling? Was I really going to run it, or did I just want to? Was I forcing myself to have "the feeling" because I wanted to run it, because this might be my only chance. That was the real kicker, this moment looking at the drop might be my only chance to run this rapid. I want to, but can I? Should I? Did I have the feeling?
I came across a great article by Clay Wright. Everyone struggles with this feeling. Is it really about the drop or rapid itself, or is it about the feeling you get afterwards?
Stepping up to Stout at Chile's 70' Middle Palguin